She stared at the veil in front of her.
She stood, rooted to her spot, while her eyes followed the gentle swaying motion of the satin, which seemed to ripple as though someone on the other side had just brushed it. She tilted her head a little, to see what was on the other side, and although her eyes detected nothing, she knew exactly who it was on the other side.
The only thing between them was this flimsy, tattered, satin veil.
She knew who it was, and she knew exactly why the veil stood between her and the person on the other side. The subtle hint of foreboding garnered by the presence of the veil was not lost on her. It’s just a piece of cloth! Push it aside! It wasn’t a door to be knocked on, kicked or broken down. But that was exactly what was bothering her, the simplicity of it all. If it was a door, she could break it with something heavy. If it was a wall, she could climb it, a rough climb but she could make it. This was a piece of cloth, all she had to do was lift her arm, push it aside, and finish it, finish everything. But she couldn’t, and she knew that she wouldn’t.
What stopped her was the fact that she was on the edge, almost to the end. It would all be over once she saw, and spoke, to the person on the other side, so that she could finally move on. But the finality of it all seemed to increase her anxiety. It took her years to get to where she was, tearing the curtains down, bit by bit, piece by piece, burning the edges, crumbling the knots. And with each step, she could feel victory, but at the same time, fear.
She couldn’t figure out why there was a conflict within her. It was something she worked for, something that she should be glad about, but somehow, there was a nagging in the back of her mind, that something worse would probably unravel itself at the end. Sure, it was natural to doubt, but the mounting anxiety, coupled with exhilaration, gave her a feeling of flying, but with only a single wing stretched out.
She rocked back and forth on her feet, bringing her arms up but lowering them down when they got too close to the veil.
What’s wrong with me?! She had always been bold, sometimes brash, but stood solid on what she wanted. She never flinched when it came to her decisions. Sure, she took her time, but she always stood her ground with them. Then why was she so…….scared? Was it the fact that she was almost there, towards the end of it all? Was she scared of what was going to happen? Or was it the severity with which she was going to deliver what she was supposed to deliver? Or was it the fact that she was doing all of this to the person on the other side? The very person who loved her, trusted her, gave her everything?
Just a step. Just one.
She could not hold it in any longer. She took a step forward, her nose almost touching the satin.
As she raised her hand to brush it aside, she could see the blur of another hand, raising, as if mimicking her every movement.
Smiling, she brushed aside the veil and what she saw stopped her heart.
A veil to her, was a shroud to the person on the other side, and when she removed it, she caught a glimpse of a familiar face staring back at her.
A wave of peace flooded through her entire body.
Finally, I am complete.
Others in the SOUJOURNS series: